Wednesday, January 20, 2010

A new challenge

I've tried to write a new post a thousand times but it always feels so depress-y and I already feel like my blog is a bit of a downer anyway. I'm trying so hard to channel the good feelings into this space but I never really feel the desire to blog until something crappy happens. I think that's why my diaries are all so depressing as well, I never feel the need to write about the good stuff. Maybe that's because I'm out enjoying the good stuff instead of sitting on my computer listening to Conor Oburst and feeling sorry for myself.

So as much as I'd love to share a cheery story with you today I have to be honest and tell you what's getting me down at the moment. Because even if this space does get a bit depress-y sometimes, the comments I get always renew my faith in the world and cheer me up a hundred times over.

I didn't get a placement in Japan. Not for this round anyway, which means I have to wait another 6 months and maybe I'll be leaving in May/June. But I might not even get in that round either! I just wish I had known that it was a possibility that I wasn't going to get a placement, they never told us that. I still want to go and I'll wait until June but I can't hang around in Melbourne for another 6 months and continue treading water like I am. I'm not saving any money at all, I'm not happy at work, and I'm just not doing anything in Melbourne that is enough to keep me here.

So I'm planning to move back home with my parents, work at a local factory and save as much money as possible in the few months that I have left here. It's not exactly an exciting proposition but at least I'll get to spend some time with my parents before I move half a world away. I'm always hoping that living back home will force me to eat a bit healthier and the gym is just down the road so I don't really have any excuses not to get fit again. This is the plan anyway, I still have to apply for a job at this factory and see if I can get in before I do anything else.

Hopefully this way at least if I don't get into the next round of placements in Japan then at least I'll have saved enough money to just head overseas and start doing my own thing instead of continuing to put my life on hold and waiting around forever.


Kerry said...

Hey... sorry to hear you didn't get the placement. That sucks, but there's an upside to every downside... and at least you get to spend some time with your family before you head off overseas. Like the Beatles songs says 'there's no where you can be that isn't where you're meant to be'... good luck!

PS: It was lovely bumping into you at Ikea the other week... I wanted to talk to you more but my family was there so sorry for the awkwardness! My sister bought a bunch of shelves and picture frames... her room is looking pretty spiffy. You know what I really want from ikea, those pretty fairy lights... but I have no idea whether they'll be long enough to drape around my four-post bed, and if the cord will be long enough to reach the power socket without looking stupid/standing out. What do you reckon?

Anonymous said...

I suggest you shouldn't wait for the placement. Waiting for something unsure wears u down. Search for new opportunities, even if it means working in the local factory for a short period. I suggest u search being an ESL teacher in other countries. Dont be sad, time heals everything


nichole said...

First - your post over on my blog made me laugh out loud! Thanks for that.

Second - I had a period during college where I moved back in with my parents and it really helped me focus, save money, etc., so that later I had the resources to move to NYC. I didn't know it at the time (because I was miserable when I first moved in), but it was the step I needed to head in the right direction.

Good luck to you!

cinta / sepi / sayu said...

oh good luck dear girl, always have your chin up. there's always a reason why things don't work put as planned, as cliche as that is.

have fun in those 6 months, something wonderful may happen! x